Dude!! You Seriously Need Help!

Drake Robertson an aspiring psychology student waited patiently for his roomie, Colten Banks to arrive to their room. As Colten entered, they exchanged greetings just prior to settling in. He peered over to Drake’s side of the room and saw small tank with a towel over it. He thought Drake might have a pet hamster, lizard or hedgehog. Drake revealed to him that it was Lucifer, his Burmese Python. Colten sternly exclaimed, “Drake! I’m scared to death of snakes.”
Drake, quite surprised, asked, “You have Ophidiophobia? I will keep him covered so you don’t have to see him.” That wasn’t exactly comforting. Days pass and the pair didn’t get along as Colten was distracted by the distain for snakes. Drake thought it would help their relationship with another pet. He went to Enzo’s Exotic Animals & Emporium and picked up a little gaffer. Colten arrived back to their room to see another even smaller tank. Drake says, “Meet Chico my Mexican Bearded Lizard.”
“Arrrrrg!” Colten screamed, “Lizards give me the willies! Keep that thing away.
Drake , very astonished, retorted, “Herpetophobia too? Aww, sorry man. I tried to get you something that would help you forget about Lucifer.”
The next day Drake returned to Enzo’s for a final try to get along with Colten. Later that day Colten now sees an even smaller tank. Drake says, “Meet Paul, my new pet tarantula.” “OH MY GOD DRAKE! Spiders give me the eebee geebies.”
Drake sadly responds, “Arachnophobia too? …Dude! you need serious help!”
Storming out of the room Colten yells back “Yes I do! In finding a new roommate.”