The Online Era – Article 10

The struggle – is real.
If you have dated someone long distance, you understand the challenges.
Some days I want to throw my hands up in defeat. Other days I nearly scream out in frustration. There are so many times that I roll my eyes in absolute disgust and wonder WHAT I’m doing dating someone who lives hours away in a different country.
When it comes to my relationship with Mike, 75% of our conversations are via text. Sometimes with texts, the ‘tone’ is unclear and easily misunderstood. Both of us being open and communicative is the only way to make things work. Luckily, we are both on board now – but this was not always the case.
In the beginning, I was constantly chasing Mike. It was always ME texting first, ME asking questions, ME initiating conversations. It was always ME making the effort. Over time, I have discovered that he (like most men) does not respond to this. If I give him some space…he eventually takes the lead. If I back off and let him miss me for a moment…he inevitably gets in touch. It’s not a game per se – but it is a dance.
Sometimes I find it hard to sit back and wait. Patience is a virtue that not everyone has. But my advice today? Do not chase anyone. Do not carry the burden of keeping your relationship alive – let them do some of the work too. Set your boundaries and your expectations and stick to them. Do NOT settle. If your person isn’t ready to put in the effort…find someone who will.